The Westering Hills

What am I writing this blog for?

I think at some point, every blogger asks themselves that incredibly ungrammatical question. That’s where I have been lately. Why am I writing this blog, what purpose does it serve?

I’m getting bored of it, tired of it, at least right now. The thought of updating it makes me yawn. I don’t have anything interesting to say, frankly. Besides the Recent Unpleasantness of Vacation Cancellation, my outside world is pretty calm. My hobbies of cooking, reading, and gardening–let’s face it, not interesting enough to fill an online journal.

There’s another aspect too, one which, the very minute I type this, is going to generate protests, but I’ll say it anyway: this blog doesn’t fully represent the real me. This is Shannon Light. And the reason this is Shannon Light is due in part to the fact that I have family reading this. I don’t mean any offense whatsoever when I say that, but I certainly am not going to let loose with some of the anger or irritation or angst that goes on in my head knowing that my mom and sisters and other family/acquaintances are reading it. Sorry, but it’s true, family. In the past, I’ve made allusions to things that bother me or anger me, and it was usually followed up by a family member wondering or worrying that I was referring to them, which in turn generated a follow-up comment/email/phone call explaining that it was not, even if maybe it was. I decided that I didn’t want to have that going on all the time, so I stopped posting anything with meat, so to speak.

I told all of this to my sister Kari a few weeks ago and she questioned it, saying, So what if family is reading it? My response to her was, Would you let loose with everything that was going on in YOUR head, knowing that family was reading it? Would you be comfortable showing sides of yourself that you normally don’t in real life? After a pause, she agreed with me that no, of course not. We all of us keep portions of ourselves hidden from everyone we know for one reason or another. I don’t know anybody that is an open book–not my mom, my dad, or my sisters. So why should I be?

Which brings me back to my original point. I’m bored with this blog because I feel that I can’t and won’t blog about anything that isn’t light or cheerful. I think I need more. Maybe a new anonymous blog, maybe just my own personal journal that is not online. I just don’t know yet. Still mulling it over.

8 Comments so far

  1. Kari May 3rd, 2008 11:13 am

    Do what you gotta do, babe! I personally don’t care if you write about being frustrated, pissed off, bored, or what ever about me. Out of all of us kids, you are the most unbiased and fair. So hit me with what you have. I can take it…but I do hit back on the rare occasion. ;}

  2. Heather May 3rd, 2008 7:03 pm

    Wait…are you talking about me? We may need to talk.

    :)

  3. jeci May 4th, 2008 9:33 am

    Keeping in mind that I’m approaching this subject with a heavy bias towards keeping your blog alive (because I like you and I like the Westering Hills and…nooooooo!), I have a thought. Perhaps you’re not inspired by your blog because you’ve deemed your hobbies, i.e., that about which you’re passionate, too boring for blogging fodder. You love to cook and you love to garden and you love to read. When you have written about those things in the past, it’s been a delight to read. The Real Food challenge was simply fantastic! Your passion *inspired* me to try eating real food too. It was an amazing journey. (And a good part of it was your discussion about your interpretation of the Pollan article too.) Don’t sell your passions short. Frankly, if you wrote about the recipes you made from the fresh food in your garden, it would be all I could do to stop myself from humping your leg. People don’t care about what you write about, they care about your passion for it. It’s just a thought!

    And another thought: I understand feeling awkward about having family members reading your blog. I feel that all the time and it gives me a little stress and disappointment. On the other hand, I take it as a living reminder of the importance of healthy boundaries. For one thing, it refreshes and highlights the boundaries I want to maintain with my family outside of my blog. For another thing, it draws attention to the fact that if something is too private to share with my family, it’s probably too private to splash over the Net for strangers to read. I have struggled with maintaining positive and healthy boundaries for myself in the past, so for me, I appreciate the opportunity to learn, even when it’s come in the surprise form of blogging.

  4. Ben May 5th, 2008 11:03 pm

    So if you quit blogging, am I going to have to (long-suffering, exasperated groan) CALL you to find out how you’re doing?

  5. sher May 6th, 2008 12:43 am

    Oh honey! I am also thinking of an anonymous blog, so that I can vent my anger at my soon to be ex-husband. I can’t talk about it in my blog because my mother -in-law would read it and be crushed to find out what her darling son has been up to.

    I have to admit that I love your blog, even though I haven’t been reading it in a timely manner. I particularly love when you write about your family and your childhood experiences. I’ve often thought about your mom and grandmother since I read your posts about them. Hope you rediscover your pleasure in this one. Or start one for Colin and Trixie. :):)

  6. Kristi May 6th, 2008 11:21 am

    I’m throwing in another vote for a private blog. Keep this one for your hobbies and other family-friendly fodder, and create a private one where you can take the “Light” out of “Shannon Light.” We all need to vent once and awhile.

  7. anne May 7th, 2008 1:34 pm

    Of course you know what my vote is - stay, stay, stay! Having said that, though, do what you need to do, of course. I’ve been feeling a little (ok, a lot) iffy lately about my recent too-personal postings and may take them down at some point. Not that my family reads, but some of my friends do, and, further, of course, I’m letting it all hang out in front of the world. Not sure that’s such a good idea, given the seriousness of the situation. Like you - and Sher - maybe an anonymous blog would be a good idea for both of us. I also love what Jeci said - I too adore your writing when you’re really passionate about something.

    Anyhow… I would miss you in the blog world if you left it. That probably goes without saying.

  8. Mom May 15th, 2008 12:17 pm

    Hey! You and Heather’s are the only blogs I get on…if you go, then what am I going to do for food ideas and such? I know, I know…read the Trader Joes cookbook you sent…but, you still have really good ideas in your blog. I agree with blogger #3…your hobbies may seem routine to you, but some of us ( I can’t imagine to whom I am referring) are not successful in growing things out in the great-outdoors! I enjoy seeing your little growing thingies and hearing about your war with whatever is eating them, ect.

    In closing, I also echo blogger #2’s comments: Huh? Are you talking about ME! sniff!

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